Not every farewell has to be a quiet one. Sometimes the deepest respect is found amid drums, music and the warmth of a crowd. This is the story of a father who, knowing his time was short, arranged a lively and dignified send-off for himself with his own hands. Out of respect for the family we have withheld their names, but the calm and openness he showed deserve to be remembered.
A Decision Made in Time
This father loved his three children deeply. When he learned that his cancer had reached its final stage, he did not give in to panic. Instead, while he was still able to move about, he reached out to a Life Managing Director at Nirvana and began to plan his own afterlife arrangements. He wanted everything settled while he was still clear-minded and able to decide for himself.
His wish was a simple one: he did not want his children, already grieving, to also worry about costs and decisions. So he chose a columbarium niche, selected a funeral service package, and set aside the budget for every funeral expense himself. All his children would need to do was carry out his wishes — everything else, he had already thought through for them.
The Send-Off He Wanted
When it came to his own funeral, this father's wishes surprised many. He did not want heaviness or gloom. He wanted a lively, celebratory send-off instead — bright and generous, just as he had been all his life. He had lived, he said, to the fullest, and he wanted to leave in the same spirit.
And so, one by one, he named the things he wished for, and our team noted each of them and prepared with care:
- A traditional funeral band, to lead the way with drums and music;
- A big-headed doll performer, a 'da tou wa', to bring a touch of liveliness and cheer to the procession;
- Three chanting masters, to lead the solemn recitation of the scriptures;
- And a funeral escort team of one hundred people, to see him off in full strength.
In Chinese tradition, a send-off on this scale is not about showing off. It is a form of completeness — a tribute to a life well lived, and an expression of the bonds shared with family and friends.
On the Day of the Farewell
When the day came, everything unfolded just as he had wished. The father rested in Nirvana's Maserati premium hearse and was carried to his final resting place with dignity and grandeur. The band played, the chanting rose, and the procession moved slowly forward — solemn, yet carrying a warm, living spirit.
Behind him followed a procession of more than one hundred people. Among them were staff from Nirvana and members of the Buddhist committee, all walking with him on this final journey. In that moment, the drums along the street were no longer sounds of sorrow — they were more like a salute to a respected elder.
A Trust Honoured
For our team, to have taken part in a farewell like this was a profound honour. The father had placed one of life's most important tasks in our hands, and all we could do was to be worthy of that trust — to carry out, with care, every detail he had held in his heart.
When the send-off drew to its peaceful close, and we watched his children fulfil their father's last wishes without burden, we felt a quiet gladness. In his own way, he had lifted a weight from his children's shoulders, and had written for himself a composed and graceful ending.
Planning Ahead, a Gift to the Family
This father's story shows us again the meaning of planning ahead. When a person is able, while they still can, to calmly arrange their own final matters, their family is spared the need to make hurried decisions in grief, or to worry over costs. That forethought is, in truth, one of the gentlest gifts a person can leave those they love.
If you would like to arrange, in advance, a resting place and a send-off that reflects your wishes — for yourself or for someone you love — our consultants at Nirvana Memorial Garden Singapore are always here, reachable on WhatsApp at +65 9652 4579. We will listen quietly, and help you settle every wish, one by one.